Monthly Archives: February 2015
I was one of the many who received a notice of Blogger’s policy change regarding sexually explicit and nudity in photos and videos. Granted, I don’t recall posting a single photo or video that would cause a problem, but since I’ve only been using Blogger a year, I figure now would be as good a time as any to switch to WordPress just in case I ever have the desire to post such things. My big question is…why would someone complain about seeing adult content when they are the very people who clicked “accept” in response to the adult content warning.
I’m sure there are blogs out there that teach people how to use a vibrator using visual aids. What about a dildo? Come on…there’s a visual aid on the tampon instructions, so wouldn’t they consider a video on how to use a dildo to be educational for the public? I mean wouldn’t you like the public to know that dildo is meant to go in this hole, not that other one, unless of course you want it there. That very same blog would in theory be allowed to show photos and videos on how to spank someone and avoid injury, right? Spank here, not here or here. The next post could include how to use an anal plug.
And, what about those who don’t use spanking as foreplay? Is that still considered sexually explicit?
This reminds me of how sex education has “progressed.” My mom tells me that when she took this class in high school there were videos and pictures. The students were even able to ask questions if they were brave enough. Now, fast forward to when I took sex ed. eleven years ago. My biology teacher handed us a copied chapter on the reproductive system (with sketches) from a textbook and said, “Here. This won’t be on the test.” That was it. And you wonder why there are more teen pregnancies than ever before? You didn’t even mention anything about birth control and condoms. No wonder so many women don’t have a clue about orgasms and how fun and exciting sex can be.
Why are we going backwards?
Anyway, like I said before, I am in the process of migrating to WordPress which, if my internet connection would cooperate, should have been done by last night. The power fluctuated on and off two days ago due to the crazy snow storm in the south…and last night my router hated me. So, with some amount of luck, I should be moved by the weekend. See you where the grass is greener!
Edit – It seems the policy change has been taken back, but I think since I’ve already started the process of migrating I will go ahead and move everything. This blog will remain open for the time being but I encourage you to visit my new blog. Please update your blogrolls, links, and feeds to be able to see future posts at https://relativity0218.wordpress.com
I was never one of those normal girls who spent most of her childhood dreaming of her wedding day. I definitely never spent any time browsing through wedding rings or looking through wedding dress catalogues. And now, that the time has come to start doing all those things I wasn’t sure where to start, but I’ve decided that the easiest thing to do would be to try to tackle one thing at a time. So, the first thing to get mostly taken care of is the wedding ring set.
On Friday, we went to an in-store event at Kay Jewelers to browse their travelling Dana Augustine selection of settings. We brought my mother’s wedding ring set because there was a good chance that if I found what I wanted, then the heart-shaped center diamond could be moved into a new setting and given back within a couple of hours of paying for the ring. The same sales ladies that were there last time came over to help us look for rings similar to the photos in my last post. Of course, there weren’t any exactly like those, so I started to look for a ring that fell under my general requirements and go from there.
I wanted simple yet elegant. Something with a smooth look and feel. I definitely did not want too many prongs to worry about snagging on things or getting knocked open…I am a mechanical engineer after all. Luckily, it didn’t take long for me to find something that had the style I wanted, but there weren’t any that had sapphires. The sales ladies then mentioned that maybe I should think about keeping the white diamond look for the main ring and using the alternating sapphires and white diamonds for the band. That way the main ring would always match whatever I was wearing whereas there is always a chance that a gemstone could clash with other jewelry and attire.
While I was looking at the setting, I decided they were probably right. I held the old ring next to the new ring to try to visualize what it would look like after we moved the center diamond over. I kept thinking that this was the one. The setting was even already in my size. The gemologist asked if she could pop out the heart and clean it up since I told her it had been in storage for about 20 years. She came back a couple of minutes later and all of us were amazed at how beautiful it was. Tom and I were both mesmerized by how it sparkled.
After about 1.5 hours of searching and talking, I finally decided that this was the setting I wanted. We paid for the ring and they told us it would be ready in two hours, so Tom and I went shopping at a few other stores while we waited.
At around 6:30 pm, we got a call that the ring was waiting for us. We returned to the store and the saleswoman handed me the box. I opened it and was simply amazed. I pulled it out of the box and tried it on. Tom said, “Wow, it looks amazing.”
This picture focuses on the heart.
This one focuses more on the channel set diamonds.
In the end, we decided that we will buy the secondary/wedding band that will alternate blue sapphires and white diamonds to complete the wedding set so that I can still have my favorite color whenever I want to wear it, but we are going to wait for a couple of months for when the Dana Augestine collection comes back around. I’m very happy and excited about all of it!
We are going back to the jewelry store today for a diamond event to meet with someone who might be able to put together a wedding ring very quickly if they happen to have the pieces to what I’d like. I have a heart center diamond from my mom’s wedding set, so I just need a setting and accents. Fingers crossed, this may go very smoothly and ridiculously fast…otherwise, it’ll be the normal lengthy process.
While I was browsing the internet for ring ideas, I came across three designs that I really liked. The first one I found many years ago.
I like the white gold one. It has little holes cut out on the sides in the shape of hearts which I thought were really cute.
The second wedding set is really pretty.
I like the way it looks and it seems like it has a low profile and is sturdy. I definitely don’t want something that’ll catch on things or will break easily.
My favorite color is blue, so I love the sapphires. It is simple yet elegant and I really like the smooth style. I only want to add a secondary band with a channel set that matches so that it looks more like a wedding set.
We had a misunderstanding that spiraled into ridiculousness yesterday, but we did talk about how to avoid or at least talk it through next time.
It all started because we each took something I said differently. He saw it his way and I saw it mine, but at the time neither of us was willing to even explore the possibility that we might have just misunderstood and that maybe what we saw wasn’t really what the other person felt or saw. I know I’m being vague.
We stayed in the kitchen and started arguing without much regard for how the other was feeling. Eventually, we did end up in the bedroom and after a brief interruption (his brother came back inside with a question about a car stereo), we had both calmed down enough to say this is what I meant versus this is what I saw. We were also able to each see it from the other’s point of view which allowed us to see where the other person was coming from in the thought process.
Upon reflection, we discussed how we might be able to avoid the messy, hurtful part in between the misunderstanding and the calm disucssion. From now on, we will try to take the other’s hand and walk to the bedroom to talk about it out of earshot of anyone who might be around and that way we can calmly work through the misunderstanding.
I also admitted to him that I have an unnecessary fear of speaking in public which includes anyone who is not in my very small circle of immediate family and friends. This does not mean that I failed technical presentations and royally suck at speaking in front of an audience. On the contrary, I actually do pretty well, but I am a nervous wreck beforehand. I worry about making a fool of myself and being embarrassed – which is exactly what happened when I attempted to switch gears while I was thinking and talking all at the same time. So, because people think I’m relatively intelligent, calm, collected, and confident, when I do accidentally stumble over my words and attempt to laugh it off, I sometimes come across as though I intentionally said something inappropriate. This is probably the number one reason why I am very quiet and reserved when someone first meets me. It takes a lot to make me feel comfortable enough to know that who I’m with will not make me feel any less if I embarrass myself. It’s the same reason it takes me FOREVER to write a comment or an e-mail to someone. I worry about how someone will take what I say. I worry about spelling and grammar. In all, it can be damned stressful for me when it shouldn’t be, but the end result – the speech, e-mail, post, or comment – usually comes out pretty well and I can be proud of what I said or wrote.
Anyway, the point is we did communicate and will hopefully do better when it comes to handling misunderstandings in the future. We live and we learn. 🙂
Note: This post includes some anal play. (I decided to take a leaf out of Beth's book and give you a warning since I know some of my readers don't care for this type of play. 🙂 )
Yesterday was our last day of being alone in our house for the next two weeks. Tom's brother is coming back into town to finish the rest of his vacation today. Since it was our last night alone for a while, I wanted to play.
Earlier in the evening, Tom asked me, "So what do you want to play?"
I shrugged, thinking that he was talking about playing a video game.
"You said that you wanted to play, didn't you?"
"So then, what do you want to do?"
Suddenly embarrassed, I mumbled very quickly, "I wannabe tied downandspanked." He smiled and I scurried away to go do laundry.
After various chores had been done and showers had been taken, I went into the bedroom and decided to get things ready before I changed my mind which I am apt to do. I pulled out the under-the-bed straps for my wrists and ankles. I moved a set of anal plugs and the Wartenberg wheel - all recent spur-of-the-moment purchases - to his nightstand.
Side Note: I used to say "absolutely not" when it came to anything related to anal play, but recently curiosity has gotten the better of me. A few months ago, we tried a small anal plug and it just felt weird - not horrible - just weird and I didn't really like it. But as time has passed, I decided that I wanted to try it again. Not sure why...just curiosity, and if it bothered me too much or I really did't like it, we would just stop. No harm, no foul in trying something new.
Back in the bedroom, I attempted to prop my Hitachi Wand angled up and in between pillows so that I would be able to lean against it while we played.
Tom walked in at this point, but I was too excited and embarrassed to wait for him to tell me what to do, so I started stripping off my clothes and got on the bed. I eagerly draped myself over the pillows. Then, he told me to turn on the vibrator. It wasn't perfectly placed but would do for now.
He picked up the crop and popped my backside a few times before securing my wrists and ankles to the velcro straps. Then, the crop returned and he lightly smacked from my bottom down my legs to the bottom of my feet. It felt a lot like getting a lightly percussive massage. (LOL, which I suppose is exactly what it is.)
He put down the crop and picked up the Wartenberg wheel. He rolled it across my back and up and down both arms then down my legs. The tingling sensation reminded me of lightly using my nails to caress my skin which has always been hard for him to mimic until now. It felt good to just focus on feeling. Nothing else mattered outside the bedroom.
At some point, he picked up the smallest plug of the new set. He lubed it up and just let it sit at the entrance to my backside. I slowly pushed against it while also grinding against my wand which was still humming underneath me. I think the combination of going very slowly and being stimulated by the vibrator helped make this experience less weird and more enjoyable. I really didn't think about the odd intrusion as much with the distraction of the added vibrations.
Eventually, the whole plug slid in and he started to slowly move it back and forth. Although it definitely felt awkward, I kind of like the new sensations. I told him I needed my hand to adjust the wand so he untied my wrist. I undid my other wrist and moved the pillows from under me so I could put weight back on my knees and move the wand.
Suddenly things started feeling really good. He started playing with the plug in such a way that it felt like it was vibrating. That combined with me controlling the wand was enough to throw me over the edge.
I collapsed on the bed and enjoyed the after effects.
Tom looked over at me and asked me about how I felt.
As my breathing returned to normal, I smiled and told him, "I felt good. I won't deny that it was certainly different, but it didn't hurt and actually felt pretty good there at the end."
Today, I'm excited for a few reasons. 1) We get to go shopping together on our way to pick up his brother from the airport, 2) Tom had roses delivered to my office today, and 3) we are going to look at wedding rings tomorrow!
Here is a picture of my roses. I told him I wanted the 2-tone kind this year. 🙂
Our first household rule:
Do NOT interrupt each other. It is disrespectful, and we both need to stop doing it.
Consequence (if I break the rule):
Ten licks with the wooden paddle.
Last night, we had a disagreement and I kept interrupting him. He made a comment about it, but instead of backing off, I started acting like a disrespectful brat. We both got pissed off and said some mean things. I walked off to the bedroom, and I thought he had walked outside. Within seconds, he decided to follow me into the bedroom, and after a brief discussion about what just happened, he made a decision.
"You are going to get 10 licks with the paddle for continually interrupting me. This is one of the reasons we start arguing and we are going to change it."
He is right about the interruptions. I tend to do it when I think he is wrong and not listening to me. Then he gets hurt because I'm refusing to listen to him. From there, it usually spirals to him walking off and not wanting to see or talk to me for a while. I absolutely hate that reaction. I'd rather him stand there and yell at me than have him walk away. When he chooses to walk away and the argument hasn't been resolved, I get this sense of feeling abandoned and it can be horribly overwhelming.
After he came in and told me that I was going to be punished, I calmed down. Oddly enough, so did he. I even ran around the bed and gave him an early Valentine's Day present! (It was a denim jacket with an internal liner for work - I swear I wasn't trying to get out of the punishment!) In fact, the mood had shifted so much that we were both laughing and smiling even before he went to retrieve the wooden paddle. I guess my eyes got big when I saw the paddle because he chuckled and said, "Yes, this is going to hurt."
He came around behind me and I leaned over the end of the bed. I handled the first three holding my breath. Thank goodness he let me keep my jeans on! The fourth and fifth caused me to whimper and then I promptly lost count in my head.
He asked, "Does it hurt?"
I replied, "Yes," because "Duh! What do you think?" didn't seem like an appropriate answer.
"It hurts me when you interrupt me and don't let me finish. It makes me feel like you don't care about what I'm saying and that you don't respect me." I felt an internal barricade break and fall.
The next couple were harder and I was trying to push myself further into the bed while crying out. A few tears leaked out with the next couple of swats (I had been on the verge of crying since the argument).
The last one was the hardest and then I felt myself relax. He asked, "Are you OK?" I nodded my head while he rubbed my back. It felt wonderful to be taken care of and loved.
At some point, we talked more and he said that if we both stop interrupting it would prevent a lot of the arguments we have been having lately. I told him that it probably would also save me some heartache from what generally comes with arguments (angry words, cussing at each other, walking away).
He replied, "Yes, it will also save you some ass-ache." I laughed and we proceeded to have a wonderful evening together.